An Excerpt from: The Bane of Telsamon

As we moved on to the next trial, I found myself checking everywhere around me in anticipation. Then, after what seemed like an eternity, we came to a gigantic gold door encrusted in jewels. Cautiously I pushed on it, it swung open, and it was surprisingly light. Raising my sword I walked in and saw… a sea of teddy bears blocking the exit.

Seriously, I’m not kidding. It was a circular room probably about 20 paces across and it was split into two sections, one was where Jonah and I were standing and the other side was a pit filled with an assortment of stuffed Kittens, Puppies, and teddy bears. They were all smiling so wide it made me want to throw up because of the happiness. I turned around expecting to see Jonah’s face puffing up as he tried not to laugh, but instead I saw a face full of fear. I tried so hard not to laugh that I must have looked like I poked my head in a beehive and got a face full of hurt. Even though little giggles were leaking out, I managed to ask, “Why are you so afraid of those teddy bears?” He turned and saw me staring at him, his face turned red and he replied in a hushed tone, “I’m not afraid of them…. it’s just that… they’re looking at me… and… they are kinda… creeping me out I guess… just… lets go and look around.” I raised an eyebrow and murmured, “Whatever” When he left and went to inspect the pit, I started to follow, but then I noticed something strange. There were medium sized round holes lining the room. I could have just ignored them but they seemed too perfectly round to be natural, so I went over to check it out.

Well at first glance it wasn’t too interesting, I mean, smooth stone, hooray! I started to stick my hand in, but then something stopped me. Curiously, I picked up a rock and tossed it through, when it reached the end of the hole; it stopped in midair and started to vibrate. It then burst into flame and fell to the ground, a pile of ashes. I gulped and suddenly felt glad I didn’t stick my hand through. Suddenly a piercing scream nearly sliced my eardrums off. I whipped around, sword in hand, expecting to see a hideous monster that wanted to eat my face off. But that teaches me a thing or two about assuming because instead I found Jonah, who was still screaming his face off, trying to stay afloat in a sea of stuffed animals. I smacked my palm to my face and walked over to help him out. When he thanked me, his face was so red that it looked like he rubbed cherry lipstick all over his face. I walked over to the pit and said to him, “C’mon man, they are teddy bears, it’s not like they’re going to attack you. See!” I stabbed my sword into the neck of a kitten, “Nothing to worry about man.” I looked at him and only saw pure fear in his eyes, “Dude! Chill. Out.” Then I realized he wasn’t looking at me, but the kitten. I looked at the little ball of fur that was impaled by my sword, only it wasn’t a cute kitten anymore, it was turning into a gigantic mass of smelly black gunk.

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